Obesity and Impotence

Headline from a News network:

Obesity May Impede Sexual Health

Got me thinking about other bloated organisms with impotence problems:

"That's why, just after the rig sank, I assembled a team of our nation's best scientists and engineers to tackle this challenge, a team led by Dr. Steven Chu, a Nobel Prize-winning physicist and our nation's secretary of energy. Scientists at our national labs and experts from academia and other oil companies have also provided ideas and advice"

That item was culled from the President's "We're really trying hard" speech about the Gulf oil disaster. Funny, the only thing I've heard in the media is BP trying different things, and failing, and government hacks pointing fingers. I have yet to hear that the US government had a clue of how to cap the well. Even the Admiral of the US Coast Guard admitted as much. I think the government is paying too much for "a Nobel Prize-winning physicist and our nation's secretary of energy... Scientists at our national labs and experts from academia" that have no effect.

The most that I've heard from US Government scientists is to hear them on NPR talking about how bad the spill is, and how bad BP was in drilling the well. If the government can't get the job done, then maybe it's time to lose some weight?

Executive Overreach

So, the President is going to force BP to pay, up front, for oil damages:

David Axelrod, Obama's senior adviser, has said a new claims plan would call for an independent third party to handle the process, and a White House spokesman said Monday the administration is confident it has the legal authority to force BP to set up an escrow account for the purpose of paying damages. [CNN]

I have a little problem with this. The Bill of Rights in the Constitution of the United States of America. Specifically, the 5th Amendment:

No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on a presentment or indictment of a Grand Jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the Militia, when in actual service in time of War or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

I don't remember BP, nor any of its employees, being so much as indicted yet. How the current administration rationalizes this overreach will be the bedrock of the next totalitarian regime's legal interpretation. Stare decisis, y'know.

Open Letter to a Neighbor

Dear Mr. Mexico,

I hope this letter finds you well. We seem to be laboring under different impressions about our relationship and the property line between your yard and mine. I don't wish to cause you distress by bringing this up, but the situation has become intolerable. As civilized neighbors, I believe we can work things out in a civilized manner.

The County Assessor's office has a clearly marked boundary on file, pursuant to our last discussion about the property line, from February 2, 1848. I do recall that it was settled under less than friendly circumstances, but a deal is a deal. While we had respectful exchanges opinions about each others' yards, we realize that our right to dictate behavior stops at our respective side of the fence. I respect your authority to set rules for your yard, so I would kindly ask that you respect my right to exercise authority over my yard.

Just because I pay you to mow my lawn doesn't give you the right to send your kids over to climb my tree whenever they want. While innocuous in and of itself, your kids frequently leave pop cans and candy wrappers on the lawn. Plus, they tend to tell my own kids that they cannot climb the tree when they are, inflaming tensions between our families.

Also, I would be so humble as to point out that there is a big difference between my inviting you over for a beer, and you coming over while I'm at work and helping yourself to the contents of my refrigerator. Your refrigerator may be near empty, but that is not sufficient justification to helping yourself to what is mine. I'm a generous guy, if you ask around the neighborhood, you'd see that it's true. Still, your presumptuousness is wearing on my patience.

Yes, some of my kids have no problem with the behavior of you and your kids, but my kids have a sketchy idea, at best, of property rights. Some of my kids like the fact that your kids will mow my lawn and wash my car so that they don't have to, but that's beside the point. I decide what goes on at my house, not the children. So, don't send your kids over to have my own kids yell at me for sending your kids home or for insisting on my property rights.

You really need to have a discussion with your children about Cause and Effect. When they throw rocks at my dog, he gets angry. That's why he's bitten your kids on a couple recent occasions. If your children insist on continuing to throw rocks, the dog's mood will not improve, and more biting will ensue. Rant and rave all you want, but they're the one throwing the rocks at the dog to begin with.

I know that my attention to this issue has been spotty, as I still am dealing with some creeps from a couple blocks over, the ones that stole my BBQ grill. Still, I do think that we need to address this swiftly and with all due civilized discussion.

Your Neighbor,

U. S. America